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The Dordogne Daily Tattler, Part 3

4/29/2015

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Picture
But the most exciting news on the Franciscan horizon is that [portion of sheet unreadable here].

Miracle of the Day:

Every day The Dordogne Daily Tattler prints the story of a Miracle as submitted by one of our loyal readers. Today’s Miracle has been submitted by Donel the Scot.

Miracle of the Neeps and Tatties

And in those days, Our Lord traveled to a wedding in Cana, more to take advantage of the free food than anything else, really. But soon the food ran out, and the bride’s father went unto Our Lord, saying, “Master, we have nay bread enow to feed the wedding flock. Cannae ye bless the neeps and tatties in such wise as to fill the bellies of all our guests?” Our Lord said, “Let it be so,” and it was so. Furthermore, He transformed a ewer of water into the finest Scottish whiskey, and the people blessed Him for it.

Joke Corner:

A kangaroo walks into a cathedral. He wants to light a candle in memory of Charles IV. The sexton says, "That'll be ten deniers. You know, we don't get many kangaroos coming in here." The kangaroo says, "At ten deniers a candle, it's not hard to understand."

*****

There was a merchant in Samarra who sent his servant to the marketplace, where he saw Death make a threatening gesture, so he ran back to his master and said, “Quick! Lend me a horse so I can go to Damascus…I mean, Baghdad,” and so he goes there and sees Death…no, the MERCHANT goes to the marketplace and asks Death why he threatened the servant, and Death said, “That was not a threatening gesture: it was a start of surprise. I was astonished to see him in Samarra, because I knew I had an appointment with him tonight in Baghdad”… I mean, Samarra! The servant was from BAGHDAD, not Samarra. He had an appointment with Death in Samarra! Or was it Damascus?

*****

Anyway, two magisters walked into a cathedral. You’d think one of them would have noticed it!

HERE ENDETH THE NOVEMBER 13TH EDITION

OF THE DORDOGNE DAILY TATTLER


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    I'm a New York grandma, living in San Antonio. I've been writing nonsense for a few years now, and I think there's enuff of it now to start a blog.

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